Friday, March 25, 2011

deep sigh

when they said that i'm pretending like i don't care,
actually i do pretending
i'm having some troubles with my mind,
and maybe this one problem will never --yes, never-- be fixed out

i'm acting like i'm okay, but i AM NOT okay
it's just that i don't wanna make them worried
(but who cares about me?)
or maybe make the 'oh-this-person-is-so-annoying' face

i said that i've used to the situation, but actually it isn't
i'm having my hard time by myself and have nobody to share it with
(but who wants to have someone else's hard times?)
i tried to be the usual me, but just failed and failed again

and i'm getting confused in each seconds | i've tried to escape but failed | i've tried to stop it but it always runs away | and i only could handle a little --yes, a little- of this heart-breaking situation, that kills me slowly

Tuesday, March 22, 2011

this is one (random) thing that i made some times ago... (nggak tau pas itu kesurupan apaan nyampe bisa bikin ginian) and (un)fortunately THEA nyuruh ini dimasukin ke buktah, nggak tau deh jadi apa kagak. so here goes...


Years of Us
(oke. ini cuma ketambahan 's' dari judul lagunya SHINee yang Y.O.U... tapi saya gak plagiat. suer)

One, two, three
Stop the count and let’s see
We’ve gone through these 3 years of us
“Do you know this boy?”, “Do you know this girl?”
I bet you’ll say “I know,”, ‘ cause we’ve been together for almost 3 years

We shared our memories
We exchanged our stories
We have one, two, three great years as one family
How many days are that?
Hundreds? I never count it before
Because what do I know is that I have spent much time with all of you

Now, when our time has come
When we have to bid our farewell
Let me tell you, just this one, simple thing
To not forget about out memories
To keep the tight friendship between us
‘cause the 3 years of us will last forever, hopefully, in our mind

gak bentuk abis =______= atau emang saya yang kagak ngarti? ah sebodo ==

Friday, March 18, 2011

CN Blue - Teardrops in the Rain

anyway i found (?) this song when i read a fanfic. then i downloaded it and try to listen to it. woohoo i love the lyric!
oh and also this is the original lyric of the song, not the translated one (i think)


No one ever sees, no one feels the pain
Teadrops in the rain

I wish upon a star, I wonder where you are
I wish you're coming back to me again
And everything's the same like it used to be

I see the days go by and still I wonder why
I wonder why it has to be this way
Why can't I have you here just like it used to be

I don't know which way to choose
How can I find a way to go on ?
I don't know if I can go on without you oh

Even if my heart's still beating just for you
I really know you are not feeling like I do
And even if the sun is shining over me
How come I still freeze ?
No one ever sees, no one feels the pain
I shed teardrops in the rain

I wish that I could fly, I wonder what you say
I wish you're flying back to me again
Hope everything's the same like it used to be

I don't know which way to choose
How can I find a way to go on
I don't know if I can go on without you, without you

Even if my heart's still beating just for you
I really know you are not feeling like I do
And even if the sun is shining over me
How come I still freeze ?
No one ever sees, no one feels the pain
I shed teardrops in the rain

Oh... I shed teardrops in the rain
Oh... Hey... Teardrops in the rain

Even if my heart's still beating just for you
I really know you are not feeling like I do
And even if the sun is shining over me
How come I still freeze ?
No one ever sees (no one) no one feels the pain (no one)
I shed teardrops in the rain
Teardrops in the rain
Teardrops in the rain
Teardrops in the rain...

Sunday, March 13, 2011

keep your head down

bukan. bukan lagunya TVXQ. nyante

mengingat besok TPM propinsi... dan bisa dibilang kalau after that test we won't have another pre-exam test except those try-outs from some high schools, dan lagi kalau diitung-itung NEM saya di TPM-TPM sebelumnya masih dibawah target so...
wish me luck for this last pre-test. karena ini yang terakhir, artinya buat besok-besok gak ada latihan lagi (apalagi aku nggak daftar TO manapun ---- kemalasan mendarah daging) kecuali latihan sendiri pakai buku soal-soal di rumah

and I wish the score will be better than before. emang sih dari TPM yang 1 sama 2 TPM ketiga kemarin itu bisa dibilang naik, tapi NEM segitu mau masuk mana coba kalau standar nilainya masih kayak tahun lalu?

and also some comments from the seniors, emang agak pedes (nggak, pedes banget) tapi saya yakin kalau itu juga buat kebaikan kita si adek-adek kelas mereka. what i saw last week is that banyak (banget) yang kesulut -- tapi sayangnya bukan kesulut mau belajar tapi malah kesulut emosinya. jadi yasudah... 'cause we see the comments from different perspectives, but i caught it as a positive (biarpun agak nyelekit) one.
dan lagi banyak benernya kok. ambil sisi positifnya aja

saya bener-bener berdoa TPM kali ini nilai bisa naik. naik semaksimal mungkin dan bertahan terus nyampe UNAS besok. tapi kalau ternyata TPM besok itu nilai naik dikit, tetep, atau malah turun, maybe i'll wish for a miracle from God, jadi pas UNAS NEM-nya 38 atau sekalian 39...

the same prayer with the other 9th-grader, right?
dan memohon pun nggak dosa. malah disuruh

cheers~
(maaf kalau judul jadi nggak nyambung sama isi. biasa, random)

Saturday, March 12, 2011

back back and back

HELLA FELLAAAAAASSSSSSSSSS *bricked* okay, i'm back. udah berapa juta taun ane gak ngeblog? *=__=*

so i'm back. from the pre-exam tests. and from the mid-term test ---- ohmygosh and next week we'll had (again) THE PRE-EXAM TEST! jadi sekarang kepala gue berasap kayak gunung merapi, kayak habis kena tsunami dan diguncang gempa (kebawa berita jepang). semoga si otak masih tahan bersarang di kepala... at least for 2 months more. habis itu njebluk

anyway, we have one sad news (yang telat). dan kayaknya juga dah banyak yang tau. about HAPENYA FARA. yang jatuh di jalan. yang ilang. cerita lengkapnya bisa dibaca disini... dan saya mengucapkan turut berduka cita atas hilangnya si hape. ah nggak asik nggak bisa ngebajak twitnya dia lagi deh. sialan *DIGAMPAR*. oke cukup sedih-sedihnya. semoga arwah si gemini putih diterima di sisi-Nya amin amin amin

dan kayaknya janji hiatusku batal ya .___________. ah sudahlah. at least i've tried it, biar cuma tahan 2 minggu B)